{"id":1917,"date":"2016-04-11T14:06:01","date_gmt":"2016-04-11T12:06:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/btm.sk\/WP\/2016\/04\/11\/ked-deti-opustaju-hniezdo\/"},"modified":"2018-05-17T22:03:01","modified_gmt":"2018-05-17T20:03:01","slug":"ked-deti-opustaju-hniezdo","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/btm.sk\/WP\/2016\/04\/11\/ked-deti-opustaju-hniezdo\/","title":{"rendered":"KE\u010e DETI OP\u00da\u0160\u0164AJ\u00da HNIEZDO"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span class=\"text\">Pod\u013ea m\u0148a existuje e\u0161te nie\u010do ove\u013ea \u0165a\u017e\u0161ie ako by\u0165 rodi\u010dom \u2013 a s\u00edce neby\u0165 rodi\u010dom. T\u00fdm mysl\u00edm dobre zvl\u00e1dnu\u0165 obdobie, ke\u010f deti op\u00fa\u0161\u0165aj\u00fa domov a za\u010d\u00ednaj\u00fa svoj vlastn\u00fd samostatn\u00fd \u017eivot.<\/span><br \/>\n<!--more--><br \/>\nJe to de\u0148, o ktorom sme dlho len nesmelo sn\u00edvali, a je odrazu tu \u2013 na\u0161e deti s\u00fa dospel\u00e9. Ak\u00e1si matka raz povedala autorke ob\u013e\u00faben\u00fdch kn\u00edh o materstve Erme Bombeckovej toto: &#8222;\u010c\u00edtala som Va\u0161e texty o syndr\u00f3me pr\u00e1zdneho hniezda, o obdob\u00ed materskej opustenosti, ke\u010f deti dorast\u00fa a opustia domov. Moment\u00e1lne som a\u017e po u\u0161i v nikdy sa nekon\u010diacom pran\u00ed, upratovan\u00ed a varen\u00ed. Mal\u00e9mu rast\u00fa z\u00fabky a t\u00ed star\u0161\u00ed sa neust\u00e1le klb\u010dia. Man\u017eel pr\u00e1ve volal, aby sme sa nave\u010derali bez neho, tot\u00e1lne mi rozhodil pl\u00e1ny. Mohli by ste mi o tom e\u0161te chv\u00ed\u013eu rozpr\u00e1va\u0165?&#8220; A Erma jej odpovedala: &#8222;Pre\u010do nie. Pr\u00edde de\u0148, ke\u010f vzorne upracete synom izby \u2013 obrovsk\u00e9 plag\u00e1ty odlep\u00edte, usteliete postele, ve\u0161iaky ulo\u017e\u00edte do skrine&#8230; \u2013 a d\u00f4razne poviete: Chcem, aby to takto ostalo! A ono to tak ostane! Poviete: Ke\u010f telefonujem, chcem ma\u0165 s\u00fakromie. Ticho! Rozumiete? A budete ho ma\u0165&#8230; Nastane koniec plastov\u00fdch obrusov, ve\u010dn\u00fdch f\u013eakov od ke\u010dupu, hradov a ve\u017e\u00ed na ne\u010dakan\u00fdch miestach. U\u017e \u017eiadne prebden\u00e9 noci, nekone\u010dn\u00e9 n\u00e1dcha, naparovanie, gumi\u010dky do vlasov v\u0161ade po byte \u010di zamotan\u00e9 \u0161n\u00farky do top\u00e1nok. Len si to predstavte! Nepotrebujete str\u00e1\u017eenie, ke\u010f chcete niekam \u00eds\u0165, pra\u0165 sta\u010d\u00ed raz za t\u00fd\u017ede\u0148, \u017eiadne rodi\u010dovsk\u00e9 sch\u00f4dzky, \u017eiadna hlasn\u00e1 hudba&#8230; Zamyslite sa nad t\u00fdm! Pr\u00edde koniec letm\u00fdch bo\u017etekov, Mikul\u00e1\u0161a a \u010dertov, chichotania, rozbit\u00fdch kolien&#8230; koniec zodpovednosti. V ten de\u0148, ako u\u017e to\u013ekokr\u00e1t predt\u00fdm, zvol\u00e1te: Kedy u\u017e kone\u010dne dospejete a budete sa spr\u00e1va\u0165 primerane svojmu veku? A oni bud\u00fa&#8230;&#8220;<br \/>\nA to je, jednoducho, cie\u013eov\u00e1 rovinka, ku ktorej v\u00fdchova det\u00ed smeruje \u2013 vypusti\u0165 ich z hniezda. To je fin\u00e1le a zmysel cel\u00e9ho pr\u00edbehu. Nie je to v\u0161ak v\u00f4bec \u013eahk\u00e9. Matka venovala cel\u00fd svoj doteraj\u0161\u00ed \u017eivot starostlivosti o svoje deti, chr\u00e1nila ich pred ka\u017ed\u00fdm nebezpe\u010denstvom. Vypusti\u0165 ich z hniezda znamen\u00e1 v\u0161etk\u00e9mu tomu ich teraz vystavi\u0165. Nie je mo\u017en\u00e9, aby sme ich uchr\u00e1nili pred chybami, omylmi, zraneniami \u2013 pr\u00e1ve prejs\u0165 cez toto v\u0161etko je nevyhnutnou s\u00fa\u010das\u0165ou procesu dozrievania a dospievania. M\u00f4\u017eeme sa pok\u00fa\u0161a\u0165 ma\u0165 ich \u017eivot pod kontrolou, nie je to v\u0161ak re\u00e1lne. Celkom jasne to vyjadril psychiater a autor knihy Rodi\u010dovsk\u00e9 tr\u00e1penie John White: \u201eNie je mo\u017en\u00e9 ma\u0165 pod kontrolou in\u00fa \u013eudsk\u00fa bytos\u0165, aj ke\u010f t\u00e1 in\u00e1 bytos\u0165 je va\u0161e vlastn\u00e9 die\u0165a. Na to nem\u00e1te opr\u00e1vnenie. M\u00f4\u017eete ho u\u010di\u0165 a vychov\u00e1va\u0165, m\u00f4\u017eete ho cvi\u010di\u0165 a tr\u00e9nova\u0165, ukazova\u0165 mu spr\u00e1vny smer, upev\u0148ova\u0165 spr\u00e1vne vzorce spr\u00e1vania, vysvet\u013eova\u0165 a \u017eiada\u0165. Ale nem\u00f4\u017eete a nesmiete ho ovl\u00e1da\u0165.\u201c<\/p>\n<p>Bol kr\u00e1sny de\u0148. V z\u00e1hrade sedela \u017eena. V\u0161ade bolo plno kvetov, vo vzduchu bolo c\u00edti\u0165 bl\u00ed\u017eiace sa leto. Vtom si \u017eena v\u0161imla nie\u010do, \u010do vyzeralo ako such\u00fd list e\u0161te z minulej zimy. Ke\u010f sa pozrela zbl\u00edzka, zistila, \u017ee je to kukla. Odrazu sa to za\u010dalo h\u00fdba\u0165 \u2013 mal\u00fd mot\u00fd\u013e vo vn\u00fatri sa pok\u00fa\u0161al dosta\u0165 von. \u017dena bola cel\u00e1 nerv\u00f3zna, ke\u010f sledovala jeho pokusy, a\u017e to nevydr\u017eala, vbehla do domu, vzala n\u00f4\u017e a opatrne pootvorila tuh\u00fd obal kukly, aby mohol mot\u00fd\u013e von. Objavilo sa jedno kr\u00eddlo, potom druh\u00e9. Bolo vzru\u0161uj\u00face pozorova\u0165, ako mot\u00fd\u013e vylieza. Zam\u00e1val kr\u00eddlami, pok\u00fa\u0161al sa vzlietnu\u0165 \u2013 len\u017ee spadol na zem. Sk\u00fasil to znova \u2013 a zase spadol. Nedok\u00e1zal sa v\u00f4bec odlepi\u0165 od zeme&#8230; \u010co sa stalo? \u017dena to s\u00edce myslela dobre, no preru\u0161ila proces, po\u010das ktor\u00e9ho mot\u00fd\u013eovi spevnej\u00fa kr\u00eddla. Ten mot\u00fd\u013e sa mal e\u0161te nejak\u00fd \u010das tr\u00e1pi\u0165 vo vn\u00fatri kukly, mal s \u0148ou chv\u00ed\u013eu bojova\u0165, preto\u017ee pr\u00e1ve to sp\u00f4sobuje, \u017ee jeho kr\u00eddla zosilnej\u00fa.<br \/>\nSpom\u00ednam si, ako som \u010dastokr\u00e1t chcel svojim de\u0165om pom\u00e1ha\u0165 a rie\u0161i\u0165 za ne ich z\u00e1le\u017eitosti. No man\u017eelka mi znova a znova kl\u00e1dla na srdce: \u201ePros\u00edm \u0165a, nechaj ich. Musia sa to nau\u010di\u0165 sami, aj ke\u010f sa pri tom trochu zapotia.\u201c Ve\u013emi dobre ch\u00e1pala, ako sa liahnu mot\u00fdle. Tajomstvo vyp\u00fa\u0161\u0165ania det\u00ed z hniezda je v tom, \u017ee ke\u010f ich, a\u017e pr\u00edde ich \u010das, pust\u00edme, tak ich v skuto\u010dnosti z\u00edskame.<br \/>\n(zdroj: www.vira.cz)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Pod\u013ea m\u0148a existuje e\u0161te nie\u010do ove\u013ea \u0165a\u017e\u0161ie ako by\u0165 rodi\u010dom \u2013 a s\u00edce neby\u0165 rodi\u010dom. T\u00fdm mysl\u00edm dobre zvl\u00e1dnu\u0165 obdobie, ke\u010f deti op\u00fa\u0161\u0165aj\u00fa domov a za\u010d\u00ednaj\u00fa svoj vlastn\u00fd samostatn\u00fd \u017eivot.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[9],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/btm.sk\/WP\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1917"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/btm.sk\/WP\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/btm.sk\/WP\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/btm.sk\/WP\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/btm.sk\/WP\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1917"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/btm.sk\/WP\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1917\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2050,"href":"https:\/\/btm.sk\/WP\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1917\/revisions\/2050"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/btm.sk\/WP\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1917"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/btm.sk\/WP\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1917"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/btm.sk\/WP\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1917"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}